


Dean's Life is a Living Hell

by spaceboy_kogane



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abused Dean, Flashbacks, M/M, Protective Castiel, Protective Mary Winchester, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-05
Updated: 2015-11-15
Packaged: 2018-04-30 04:11:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5149811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spaceboy_kogane/pseuds/spaceboy_kogane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel shows Castiel Dean Winchester's past life of abuse, pain, and sorrrow when Sam Winchester left for college. But when Mary comes back and sees the abuse as Castiel is... Let's just say she's not the happy angel we thought her to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"You let him run off by himself?!" John screams at his oldest son. Dean feels fear and panic arise in his chest. 

"I-I didn't purposely let him run off, Dad. I was asleep. It was the middle of the night," Dean says, trying to keep his voice steady. He knows what's coming. He knows he's going to get it, no matter what he does. 

"And do you know where Sam is now, Dean?! No! You don't! Why? Because you're a failure!" John lands a punch to the side of Dean's face, knocking him to the ground. John kicks him in the side before he can even attempt to get up. "I should have left you in that fire to burn with your mom all those years ago! You don't do a damn thing! You're so stupid!" He punches Dean's chest, making his son groan in pain. "Come on, you slut! You can take pain, can't you? You're always whoring off every night! You faggot!" He pulls Dean up by his hair, making him yelp in pain. 

"I'm sorry, Dad! I'll find Sammy somehow, I promise! I swear on my life!" Dean begs. "And if I don't find him, you can hit me as much as you want, and I won't do anything to resist! Just please, don't hurt me right now! My baby brother is gone!" He accidentally lets a tear slip down the side of his beaten face. John grabs Dean by his collar, breathing the scent of smoke and alcohol in his face. 

"You're such a little bitch, aren't you? Only bitches cry, dumbass!" John chuckles darkly. "And I'll do whatever the hell I want to do with you." Dean's usually bright eyes are now broken and terrified. 

"Dad, please... No. I'll do anything but that. Please." 

"Shut up!" He punches Dean's throat, making the younger man gag slightly, wheezing. "I told you, I'll do whatever I want with you. What's rule number one?"   
Dean gulps. "Keep Sammy safe.."   
"And you broke that rule, because Sammy's gone hell knows where!" John growls. "What's rule number two?"

"Always listen to Dad," Dean recites quietly. "Always follow orders from Dad."

"And what are you doing?"

"N-not following your orders..."

"Bed. Now."

"D-dad! Please!" Dean begs, sobbing. "Please don't do this! I'll listen, I swear! You can hit me every day until I find Sam. I'm disgusting trash, I'm a whore! I know! Just please!" Dean bites back tears. Fear floods through him like a tidal wave. What If his dad doesn't listen?

"Bed. Now." John repeats, anger rising. "Now, Dean!" Dean slowly crawls onto the old motel bed. 

"D-dad..." Dean pleads, tears flooding down his face, his eyes red and full of fear. 

"Dean, shut the hell up before I really make you do something bad!" John orders. "Undress." 

"But-"

"DEAN!" John booms, scaring Dean more. He follows John's orders, shaking the entire time. He keeps his boxers on of course. "Touch yourself." 

Dean knows not to argue further, so he slowly slides his hand into his boxers, rubbing himself gently. 

"Like you mean it, boy," John rolls his eyes as he starts the camera he's pulled from his duffel. Dean locks his eyes shut, refusing to open them. 

He can only hope nothing escalates...

\------------

Sam slides into a seat on the bus, starting his run to college. He pulls his phone out and flips it open. 

 

YOU HAVE (0) NEW MESSAGES

YOU HAVE (0) NEW VOICE MAILS

 

Sam sighs and lays his head on the window. Maybe they haven't realised he's gone. Maybe they don't even care...

He shakes his head slightly, ridding himself of the thought. He knows Dean would never forget about him that quickly.

Would he? 

\-------------  
"Gabriel... why are you showing me this?" Cas asks quietly. 

"I don't want to, Castiel, but I had to. That is what Dean's nightmares have been about lately. That is what's making Dean so distant from you and Sam right now. He's scared," Gabriel explains. "You have to be there for him no matter what he says. He may tell you to piss off, but you have yo stay there with him. You know that John will be coming back soon, and there's nothing even I can do to stop it."

"Why the hell not, Gabriel?" Cas says angrily. "Dean's going through enough right now. He doesn't need that bastard there to scare him any more than he already has. Dean doesn't need it."

"I'm sorry, little brother. It has to be done." 

"Because of fucking Destiny, right? It's Dean's Destiny to be broken even further from his supposed to be dead father? It's not fucking right!" Castiel curses. "Gabriel, why are you letting this happen?!"

"You think I want this to happen?" Gabriel says back. "Castiel, I see how much you love him, and when he's hurt, you're always upset! You're little brother. I don't want you to feel anything but love and happiness."

"I need to see Dean. Now. Let me go. Dean is calling me," Cas says stubbornly. Gabriel sighs. 

"I have to bring you back here tomorrow," he snaps his fingers.   
\---------

"Dean," Castiel says monotoned.

"Hey, Cas," Dean stiffness as Cas hugs him tightly. "Jesus, Cas, missed me?"

"Dean, anything you want, I'll get it," Cas says. "Except for anything exceptionally huge."

"Cas, what's wrong with you?"

"Nothing, Dean."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean has a panic attack.

Dean lay curled up around himself on the bed away from his father. His tears have long been stopped from his father forcing him to stop crying. 

Dean didn't like one second of what happened to him. He feels so dirty. So unworthy of anything but pain and suffering. 

His eyes are red and burning from the tears, and he's curled up in the blanket. His eyes are wide open with fear. He's taken a long shower after the violation of his body. 

 

Fuck, maybe he did deserve it. Maybe it's already happened to Sam. But not by his own father. 

He can't have it happen again. Ever. But it's not as if he could report it to the police. All that would do is get him arrested for the crimes he himself has committed. It's not like he could call any one. 

Mom's dead.

Bobby's not even going to believe him, and even if he does, all Bobby can do is sit back and try to coax him. Tell him that John was drunk, and that he'll apologize soon. 

But rape isn't something John can simply apologize for. Nothing will ever be the same with his father and himself. Never again. Not ever. 

Maybe Sam might answer...  
It's worth a try. 

He slowly reaches for his phone and flips it open. He presses the OK button on Sam's contact. 

It rings for a few seconds before going to voicemail:

"Hey this is Sam Winchester. Can't get to the phone right now, so if it's an emergency, call my big brother Dean. He'll know what to do." 

Dean sighs, using his broken and weak voice to leave a voicemail. 

"H-Hey Sammy. It's Dean. It's been a week since you l-left. Sammy, please come back. I need you. Things aren't r-right here any more. D-Dad did.. Well that's not important. Just please. Please come back."

He closes his phone shut and puts it back on the end table. 

"God, if you can hear me, it's Dean Winchester. Look, I know I don't have the best track record, but I need some help here. Get me the hell out of here. My dad just.. Fuck, he raped me, okay? I'm just tired of being hit and left behind. 

I would run away like Sammy did, but where would I go? I'm too stupid to get into college. Hell, I haven't even finished high school. 

But if you could get me out of here, I'll be forever grateful. 

I guess I'll leave you alone now. Bye." 

He curls up more, cuddling the pillow close to his chest.   
"Man, I need my mom.."   
\------  
Sam wobbles into his apartment with Jess, totally drunk off his ass. 

"Woo! That fuckin' rocked!" Sam slurrs. His cheeks are rosy from the alcohol, and he has a lazy smile. 

"See how much you've been missin' when you haven't been here, Sammy?" Jess smiles. "College kicks ass!" 

"Hell yeah!" He laughs out loud. 

No one realised the buzzing phone in Sam's pocket. 

\--------  
"Is that why Dean doesn't have faith?" Cas asks quietly. 

"Not just that," Gabriel says, regrettably. "It gets worse, kiddo.. much worse.."

"Gabriel, what's going to happen?" Castiel turns to his brother, worry deep in his expression.

"Just... go cuddle Dean. He needs it right now. Nightmares again," Gabriel brushes it off. 

"Fine," he sighs and flies away.  
\------

Dean wakes up with tears in his eyes and shaking uncontrollably. 

"C-Cas..." He whispers. Whispering is all he can get out. "S-Sammy..." 

He realizes no one can hear him and starts hyperventilating. He feels like he can't breathe, and his lungs are melting. 

He's having a panic attack.

"S-Sammy.." He tries again, his voice getting slightly louder. This only makes his lungs burn more. 

'Cas. I can't breathe, help.' He prays to the angel.   
\------

Castiel hears the prayer from the Hunter, making him fly faster to Dean's room.

He appears in the room next to Dean, looking at him with a worried expression. 

"Dean, I'm here. Calm down," Cas says softly. 

"He's gonna get me," Dean wheezes. "He's gonna get me, Cas. Keep him away from me."

Cas's eyes widen as he realizes what Dean is panicking about. He frowns and sits next to him, gathering Dean in his strong arms. He lays his hand on Dean's shoulder, where his mark was, making Dean's wheezing stop slightly. 

"It's alright, Dean. I know what he did to you," he says gently. "Your father was wrong for what he did. You were so young. You didn't deserve any of that."

"C-Cas, he h-hit me," Dean whispers, crying into Cas's shoulder. "Every day. C-called me a s-slut."

"You aren't a slut, Dean. You're beautiful, and if anyone tells you otherwise, I will smite them where they stand. You didn't deserve to be hit, and you don't now."

He runs his fingers through Dean's hair, calming the hunter down more. Dean has a splitting headache, and he's still shaking like a screen door in a hurricane. 

The angel knows that Dean will either not remember this tomorrow or act like it didn't happen. He knows the older Winchester enough now to tell. 

But until then, he will be there for Dean. It angers him that John did this to such a soul once filled with happiness, hope, and confidence. Dean didn't deserve any of it. All he was doing was trying to keep his brother safe. 

Castiel mentally makes a note: It's now Dean's turn to be taken care of. 

Whatever Dean needs, Castiel will do it. Even if he just wants a sandwich, Castiel will do it. 

Anything for Dean. Just like it's always been.  
\----------

Mary watches over her oldest son with fury in her usually happy eyes. How dare John do this to her babies? 

Mary died to protect her children. And she'll be kicked out of Heaven and damned to Hell if she's died in vain. 

"Dean has always been great with Sam. Always. He's repayed by being raped by his own father?! Over and over again at that!" Mary screams in anger, making the windows rattle: "That son of a bitch!"

"My poor baby. Dean. Been starved all these years. Been abused and neglected all these years. Thank God that angel is there for him right now. 

"My poor Sammy. He's been without me all his life. His girlfriend is dead. Every thing goes wrong for him. He doesn't deserve that either.

"Damn, I wish there was something I could do..."

Her eyes widen and she smiles as she gets an idea. 

"Maybe there is.."

She picks up her phone that she uses to keep in touch with others in Heaven. 

"Mary Winchester! How ya doin', dollface?"

"I could be better right now, Gabe," she replies. 

"Awe, what's wrong? Ash spiked your drink last night?"

"Nope. Not this time. I'll explain later. Meet me at my place?"

"Of course! See ya in 5!"

"I'll have the pie and candy ready for you," she smiles and hangs up. Mary sets her phone down and waits. 

Gabriel shows a few minutes later. 

"Now, what's going on?" He asks, his wings flapping slightly. 

"I just found out that John is a douche bag," she frowns. Gabriel's smile fades quickly. 

"You saw?"

"Sure did. That bastard hurt my boys? Oh hell no," Mary almost growls. "He ain't getting away with that."

"What are you gonna do, Mary? Little brother Cassie's as pissed as you. He's real protective over your boy, you know," Gabriel smiles a little, trying to lighten the mood. 

"Y'know, I'm really gonna have to repay your brother. He's real good to Dean," she smiles back. "If only Dean would see how much Castiel cares."

"Oh, believe me, I think he sees it. I just think he doesn't want to believe it," Gabriel rolls his eyes and imitates Dean's tone, "I ain't gay, Sammy! Everybody shut the hell up about it!" 

Mary snorts a little. "That was pretty damn good."

"I myself am pretty damn good," Gabriel boasts. 

"So you'll help me?" Mary looks at him with pleading eyes. 

"Hellz yeah," Gabriel says with an attitude. "Now, where's the candy?"


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean's nightmares get worse and worse..

Dean wakes up the next morning drowsily. He didn't even get 4 hours the night before from the pain and aching reminder of what's been happening. 

"Get up, slut," John's voice orders. Dean immediately shoots up. 

"Yes, sir?" he says obediently. 

"Were you crying last night?" 

Dean feels panic shoot through him. If he lies, he gets punished. If he tells the truth, he gets punished. Either way, he looses. 

"Y-yes sir," he says quietly. If he tells the truth, maybe it won't be so bad today. 

"And why were you crying?" John asks angrily as he ties his boot. "And don't you dare even think of lying to me."

"I- I had a nightmare, sir," he confesses. "And I missed Sammy.."

"Only bitches cry when they miss some one!" He barks at him, making Dean shrink into the bed more. 

"I'm sorry, sir. It won't happen again," Dean says, trying to steady his tone. 

"Yeah, well. I have people coming over later. Go get your nasty ass in the shower, and don't use all the hot water. 5 minutes only."

Dean quickly hops up and dashes into the shower after grabbing the clothes he set out the night before. He starts the water and gets in, starting to wash off immediately. He has a tear run down his face as he feels the come wash off of him. 

"Jesus.." He mutters. He washes his hair off and turns the water off. 

He dries himself off and slides his boxers on. He sets his hands on the white sink and looks at his broken body in the mirror. His hair is wild, even if it's wet. His usually bright green eyes are now dull and show sadness and fear. He feels weak and ugly. 

He feels like a fucking whore. 

But that's what he is, right? He used to sell his body for money to feed his baby brother. 

Sammy was always hungry. Always. 

/"Dean, I'm hungry! Why didn't Dad leave enough money?" He remembers Sam whining for the last time. 

"I don't know, Sammy," he remembers hunger stabbing at his stomach like a knife. He'd emptied his bowl into Sam's while he wasn't paying attention. "I'll get us some money somehow. One day, you'll never go hungry ever again."

"When will that day be, Dean?" Sam would ask.

"Not sure. One day," he smiled sadly at his hungry brother. "Don't worry, Sammy. I got everything under control." 

That night, Dean snuck out while Sam was asleep. He saw a man with a lot of money on his hands at the time. He took a deep breath and approached him.

"Hey, you," he flirted. "You look lonely."

"I might be," the man said back. "What can you do about it?"

"Anything you want, gorgeous," Dean smiled a little. "Depends how much money you got, though."

"How bout I make you scream tonight?" the man said. "Name's Chris."

"Dean," he smirked. "And you know, I think I might like that. Pay first though." Dean whispers in his ear. "I'll do anything you want. I'm yours tonight."

He felt Chris shiver under his touch. He chuckled a little. Dean's eyes lit up as he saw the 3 hundred dollar bills slip into his own pocket. 

"Depending on how good you are, I'll give you more," Chris replied.

"Well what are you waiting for? Take me home," he ran his fingers up Chris's chest. "Lay me down. And make me scream your name."/

Dean earned 300 dollars more that night. 

He remembers Sam's excited look when Dean bought him more than enough food for the next two weeks. 

/"Dean, how the hell did you get all this?" he asked.

"Don't worry about it, Sammy. I'm awesome, what'd I tell you?" He smiles as he stirs the food in the pan./

"Dean! Hurry the fuck up!" John yells and he pounds on the door, making Dean jump. 

"Y-yes sir!" He stutters. He quickly slips on the rest of his clothing and walks out the bathroom door. 

"What took you so long, boy?" John drunkenly smirks. Drunk already, and it's only 9:30 in the morning. 

"I-I'm sorry, Dad. I didn't pay attention to time. I wasn't paying attention," Dean answers. 

"You'll be paying for that later." 

John's voice and the way he slams the bathroom door makes Dean cringe and shrink back. He knows what's coming tonight, and he can't do anything about it either. He whimpers quietly in fear. 

Dean fights back a tear, remembering last time. It's not fun. At all. It hurts more than anything. He remembers not having much of an issue with it when he was with strangers. Dean used to, hell, even enjoy it.

/"Oh God, harder. Harder, I said. I'm not gonna break," he said to Chris. 

"If that's what you want.." Chris smirked and slammed harder into him. Dean moaned out and pushed back on him. 

"Ah, yes. Fuck.. Oh, God. Right there," he moaned out.

"You're good at this," Chris said to him. "Sexy."

Dean chuckled a little. "First time doing stuff like- F-fuck! Jesus, Chris, harder! Right there.. oh God. I'm close.."

"Let go for me, Dean."/

Dean runs a hand through his matted and now damp hair. 

There were many more times after Chris. The longer he did it, the better he got. The better he got, the more he could take. The more he could take, the more noises he could make. The more noises he could make, the more money he'd get. The more days Sammy didn't go hungry. 

"People are coming over to see you today, Dean," John says as he emerges from the bathroom. 

"Really?" Dean asks. Maybe he could get out through them..

"Yeah. They're coming to see you bend over and take it deep like you usually do," he laughs. 

"Oh.." 

"Oh, don't act so upset! You'll be getting paid for it! And I won't be doing it. It'll be a young kid. Around your age. His name is..." John checks his hand. "Greyson."

"How much?" Dean dares to ask. 

"Bout maybe 500," John answers. "Now you wanna do it, don't you, you slut?" 

Dean stays quiet. He doesn't want to do it, but money's money. 

"You do! You just can't wait to have that kid make you scream, huh?" He laughs again. "But when those people do come, you'll do your best. If you cry, I'll beat you so hard you won't be able go move for a week, got it?"

"Yes, sir," Dean answers.

"Good."  
\----------  
Castiel winced at Dean's flashback. He knows that Dean had to do things to get money, but not that way.  
"Why is it now that Dean is seeing these flashbacks?" Castiel asks. 

"His mind is telling him his father is returning," Gabriel explains. "I think he knows, just doesn't want to believe it."

"Why is John coming back? Why is it so important for his return?"

Gabriel sighs. "To be honest, Cassie, I have no idea."

"What can I do?" Castiel asks. 

"Just comfort him as best you can," the archangel says. "He's gonna need you." 

"He's waking up. I must leave."

And with that, the young seraph is gone. 

Gabriel smirks a little and let's his wings out. 

"Time to go pay Mary a visit," he says and flies off.  
\-----

"Honey! I'm home!" Gabriel sing songs as he opens the door in Mary's house, which was her Heaven. 

"Hello Gabriel," Mary rolls her eyes and laughs. 

She always had a great relationship with Gabriel. Of course she was kinda pissed when he kept killing her older over and over, but she understood what the archangel was trying to do after a while. Now Gabriel comes over on a daily basis, and he obsesses over Dr. Sexy MD and keeping his brother, Castiel, safe. 

"So Cassie's with Deano right now. Probably cuddling him or something," Gabriel explains. "But we have to think how we're gonna kick that bag of dicks', John's, ass."

"We sure do. That fucker made my baby boy do that? I'm gonna kill him again," Mary growls. 

"Well, Mary, we don't have much time. He'll be back in.. about a week.."  
\---------  
Dean is cooking breakfast for himself and Sam silently. He's shaking slightly from last night's nightmare. 

He doesn't understand why these flashbacks are coming back. He usually was able to block them out, and they haven't been back for about 2 years. Of course, they'd come when someone mentioned his father, but they didn't leave him this shaken. 

He realizes that he might have died if it wasn't for Cas calming him down. 

"How are you feeling, Dean?" Castiel asks quietly from behind him. Dean jumps slightly before he answers. 

"Jesus, Cas. Scared the hell out of me," Dean sighs on relief, noticing it was just the angel. 

"My apologies," he says. "Now, how are you feeling, Dean? Do you need anything?"

"Woah, where is this coming from?"

"After last night, my worrying intensified with you," the angel explains. 

"Well, I'm okay, so you don't have to worry about me. It was just a nightmare," Dean says quietly. "And I would appreciate it if you didn't tell Sam."

"I won't. But Dean, that wasn't just a nightmare. Gabriel showed me," he says.

Dean is silent. 

"Fuck," he mutters. "Why did he show you? How long had this been going on?"

"Only about three times. Since these started, really," Castiel says. "I'm not sure why he showed them to me."

Dean starts shaking harder, dropping the spoon into the pan. He slams his hands on the counter top to steady himself before he falls down. His breath comes out ragged, and he closes his eyes. 

Castiel's eyes widen, and he quickly walks over to Dean, wrapping his arms around his waist to steady him. 

"Dean, calm down. It's okay," he says gently. 

"N-no it's not. H-he's coming back, isn't he?" 

"I don't know, Dean."

"F-fuck, I can't b-breathe," he wheezes. His vision is becoming black around the edges, and he wobbles around, even in Cas's secure arms. 

"Dean. Dean. Calm down. It's okay. Deep breaths."

Dean goes limp in Cas's arms. 

"Dean?" No response. "Dean!"


	4. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brief smut. Gabriel and Mary talk about Sam. Castiel waits for Dean to wake up.

“Dean! Dean, please wake up!” Castiel cries and shakes the hunter. “Dean please… I need you.” \----------- “Dean!” John calls. 

“Yes, sir?” Dean answers obediently, standing straight and tall with his shoulders back. 

“Obedient too, John? Damn,” a man- maybe 45- with brown, very short hair whistles. “So scared, I can see it in his eyes.”

“My son isn’t scared. Are you, Dean?” John looks at Dean with threatening eyes. 

“I’m not afraid of anything. I just listen to my dad like I’m taught to,” Dean answers as best he can. 

“Well hey there, hottie,” a 23 year old says. His dark hair is flipped out of his almost grey eyes as he looks at Dean lustily. He has on well-fitting jeans and a Led Zepplin shirt with biker boots and a leather jacket. He was definitely someone Dean would go for if the guy wasn’t about to rape him.  
But it wasn’t technically rape, was it? Dean is letting the man do this to him. In front of other men at that. 

“I’m Greyson Sterek,” he says. “You must be Dean.”

“Yeah. That’s me,” Dean forces a smile. Greyson looks at him from the top of his head to his boots. 

“Well, I gotta say, you’re a hot babe,” he whistles that flirtatious whistle, making Dean blush faintly. 

“I’m not a babe!” he protests. 

“Ooh, defensive,” he smirks and looks over to the 45 year old. “I dig this guy.” The man smirks. 

“Go on then. Have your way with him,” he says and nods his head towards Dean. “Come on, John. Let’s go drink somewhere.” John nods, and they both stalk out the door

“Alright,” Greyson smirks and pulls his own shirt off, making Dean stare slightly. “Like what you see, babe?”

Dean simply looks away, rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry. Just… nervous, I guess.”

“This your first time?” Greyson asks gently. 

“No. I lost count,” he bites his lip after he says it, not meaning to. Greyson laughs a little.  
“It’s okay. You have to support your family somehow, right?”

“How do you know about that?” Dean asks, surprised. 

“Chris is a friend of mine,” Greyson says. “My boyfriend now, actually. I shouldn’t have told you that.”

“No, no. It’s okay,” Dean assures him. “Wouldn’t you rather be with him right now?”

“Believe me, I do. My dad doesn’t know about him. He’d kill me,” he replies. “You truly are hot, and you seem real nice, but my heart belongs to Chris.”

“I get that,” Dean agrees. 

“But if we don’t do anything, our dads will suspect something,” Greyson sighs. “And we have to get it on camera.”

Dean freezes. “O-okay.”

Greyson strides over to him and hugs him, kissing his head gently. “It’s okay. We won’t do anything you don’t want to. I’ll start soft, but you know how your dad wants you to be.”

Dean winces. “Y-yeah. Can we just get this over with?”

Greyson nods and starts the camera. He pulls Dean close and wraps his arms around his waist. 

“I’m gonna make you scream my name so loud tonight, everyone in the entire motel will hear you,” he mutters in Dean’s ear. 

“Do it then,” Dean mutters back. “Make me beg.”

Greyson presses his lips to Dean’s in a heated kiss, slipping his tongue into Dean’s mouth as he’s caught by surprise. He pulls Dean’s shirt off, throws it to the ground, and slams Dean onto the bed. He kicks his boots off, as well as Dean’s. 

30 minutes later, Dean is gripping the sheets, blinking back tears. All he can think about it the camera. His father will be watching this, as well as another man he doesn’t know. 

“Harder, Greyson! Faster! I’m not gonna fucking break!” he groans as the 23 year old slams onto his prostate. “F-fuck.. Right there. Oh God..”

“So hot, babe. How ya feeling?” Greyson’s deep voice says into his ear.

“I want you harder. Now. I need you. I’m so fucking close,” Dean moans. 

Greyson smirks and goes in and out, faster and harder onto Dean’s prostate. Dean moans like a porn star and pushes back onto Greyson. 

“I’m close, holy fuck,” he gets out.

“Come for me, Dean.”

Dean moans loudly as he lets go.

His father had better be proud of him for this. \--------- 

“Gabriel, what’s happening to my baby?” Mary asks with worry lacing her tone.

“Dean is just unconscious. He’ll be okay, Cassie’s just overreacting,” Gabriel explains. 

“Then why did Dean say he couldn’t breathe?”

“He could. It’s just what happens when you go into a huge panic attack. You feel like you can’t breathe, and that you’re dying. That’s what happened to him. Castiel is just worrying about Dean like he usually does. Worrying about that boy never ends for him. He’s always asking himself: Is Dean okay? What does he need? Does he want anything? Is he dying? Is he drunk? Dean, Dean, Dean,” Gabriel smiles a little despite himself and rolls his eyes. “Everything is Dean with that angel, I swear.”

“I need to thank your brother when we meet. That kid gets my eternal thanks,” Mary says. “He’s been keeping Dean safe for so long, it’s not even funny.” She looks over to Gabriel who is now looking out over Earth, paying attention to her youngest, Sam Winchester. “You too, Gabriel.”

Gabriel snaps from his thoughts. “Hm? What about me?”

“You and your brother raised my boys from Hell. That’s kind of a big deal,” she says. “And don’t think I don’t know about how protective you get over Sam.”

“What are you talking about? Shut your face,” Gabriel avoids her gaze, looking back to watch over Sam.

“I remember when a few other angels were making fun of Sam, calling him stupid and that he should be left to rot in Hell. You got so pissed so quick! It took me, Ash, Jo, AND Ellen to hold you back from smiting the hell out of all 5 of them! Sam means a lot to you, but you just don’t want to say it.”

“Whatever. Someone has to pay attention to the poor moose. He feels so alone when Castiel and Dean are together, staring each other down.”

“And how would you know that?”

“….”

“Maybe because you know everything about him? His favorite candy. His favorite way to have his coffee at Starbucks. You know it all, Gabe. You know every single part of his body.”

“Maybe because an angel never forgets the fact that he himself had to go down to Hell to save a huge moose, and the fact that he had to put the poor bastard back together again like Humpty Dumpty?”

“My point exactly! You risked your life to save Sam by going into Hell’s flames and doing everything you could to keep him safe,” Mary says. “Gabriel, you saved him. You’re his angel. You’re his hero, and you know it.”

“He doesn’t even know I’m alive, Mary,” Gabriel mumbles. 

“So what’s stopping you from telling him? Go, my child. Be free to be with Sammy!” she urges and shoves him gently towards the door of her Heaven. \------------ 

 

“Dean!” Cas yells. 

Dean gasps for air as he wakes up, clutching onto the angel for dear life it seems. Cas runs his fingers through Dean’s short hair and holds him close to his chest. 

“Don’t do that ever again, Dean Winchester!” Cas tells him. “You scared the hell out of me!”

“I’m sorry, Cas,” Dean shrinks away slightly. “It’ll never happen again. I’m sorry. Please don’t hurt me.” 

Castiel’s eyes widen as he notices what’s happened. “Dean, I wouldn’t ever hurt you on purpose.”

“You’ve done it before though,” Dean says quietly. 

“I know…” Cas sighs. “But the past is past. Nothing and no one will ever touch you again and make you feel bad without me going after them, alright?”

“Okay..” Dean mumbles. 

Damn. These flashbacks are driving Dean insane, and Castiel knows it. Dean can’t take much more of this before…. 

Before he snaps..


End file.
